The Wild Card

Wild Card
Wild Card
Hello Gentlemen,

Wow, I had no idea “The Ways a Girl Flirts” would be such a popular post! Thank you. I don’t even think that’s the funniest post, my online dating post is my favorite in my opinion.

Now, to follow up on “The Ways a Girl Flirts”, a lot of guys have been mentioning “The Wild Card”. The Wild Card is when a girl likes you but doesn’t want you to know it because she doesn’t know if you like her.

So, this is what’s happening to the girl.

A girl has a crush on a guy, and probably thinks the guy is totally out of her league or it would create some drama if he knew and didn’t like her back. This scenario plays out most in the work space. I know it happened to me a long time ago…

Long long time ago, in a restaurant far far away… I had a crush on a co-worker. I thought he was way cute at the time, he was older, and I didn’t have a clue on how to act around him. This was typical of me when I had a crush on a guy. I didn’t want to show that I liked him, so I would act total opposite, I wouldn’t talk much and try to stay away.

Think about it, when you have a crush on someone, you’re probably staring at the person all googglied-eyed and could spend forever talking about some random topic, “the celery wasn’t my FAVORITE, but I definitely preferred the cucumber over the lettuce..” and make no sense, but saying ANYTHING to this person would make you blush.

So, obviously, you want to avoid the person so you don’t look like a total idiot. You refrain from talking to the person too much, and you don’t want to say anything stupid. You don’t want to be caught dreamily staring at the person, so what do you do?

Act cold.

You don’t talk, don’t look at them in the eye. Or, that’s what I would do in my case. Which didn’t work in my favor at all, because the guy would have no clue that I was dreaming about being in his arms. Awwww…

So, this can be VERY difficult for a guy to find out. Does the girl really find me repulsive or does she like me and is trying to hide it?

If a girl finds you repulsive, she’ll probably give you a weird face. Like, “don’t-look-at-me-you-pervert” face. If a girl is just intimidated by you, she’ll probably just cut her gaze short, look at the floor and act awkward. She’ll smile at you, but then walk away after an interaction because she’s nervous. Girls get super nervous around guys too! I know guys are all freaked out about asking a girl out, but girls can be so nervous around guys they like.

To be clear, if a girl doesn’t like you at all, she won’t smile at you, she won’t try to talk to you at all, she’ll just ignore you (and for some reason you guys LOVE that) and if she’s also giving you the stink-eye, yeah, she doesn’t really want to get to know you.

If she’s nervous, cutting her gaze short, smiling but then leaving quickly, looking at the floor, she just might like you, you devil, you.

How do you respond? Talk to her! If she likes you, she will light up and start chatting with you. If she doesn’t want to talk, see how she’s acting, pay attention to body language, and that will be your biggest clue.

Ok, gentlemen, I hope this clears up the mystery of “The Wild Card”.

Good luck!

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The Do’s and Don’ts of Texting a Girl

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Ye Ol’ Texting Machine.

Hello Gentlemen,

Thank you for reading my posts. I know it’s been a while since I have written. Honestly it’s a bit hard coming up with fresh ideas all on my lonesome. But I see you all are still reading and following my blog! That’s awesome. Thank you!

For today’s blog we’re going to go over the Do’s and Don’ts of Texting a Lady.

My friend told me to check out Aziz Ansari’s appearance on Conan two nights ago and how he talked about what it’s like being single. He went on to talk about how texting a girl is a crapshoot and extremely frustrating.

Our attention spans are shortening daily. We are stimulated all the time with our phones, the internet, there’s never a second to get bored. We are bombarded with images and stories and random research.

So, when it comes to texting, it’s easy to get distracted by other things, and game-playing in the dating world is extremely high. How long to text back? Don’t be TOO eager! Don’t say anything dumb! Be aloof!

With texting messages get confused, people get hurt and time is wasted by waiting for a little ding! on your phone which determines your happiness… for the foreseeable next few minutes.

Phew! How exhausting!

Here’s how to cut through the crap, the Do’s and Don’ts of Texting a Girl:

Let’s start with the Don’ts:

1. Don’t start a text with something completely vague as “hey” without some kind of follow-up. For example, if a guy texts me “hey” and nothing else, how am I to respond? With another “hey”? or “hey, how are you?” but then, the guy is making ME do all the heavy lifting of asking how he is doing when he wasn’t courteous enough to inquire how I was doing. How rude! So, fellas, when initially texting a girl, please follow up with a question. “Hey, how are you doing/what are you up to/how’s your day?” is an acceptable starting text. When you don’t make the effort, why should the girl?

2. Don’t text and disappear for a few hours and come back like nothing happened. A guy and I might be texting, then all of a sudden he drops off the face of the planet and comes back with a response as if nothing happened.

I’m thinking: he has no regard for my feelings, I should be way more lax about when he answers, but wait a minute, he if doesn’t care about being timely, what else does he not care about? Should I reply back right away?

Gentlemen, acknowledge you absence, say, “hey, a friend needed my help moving” or something. By not acknowledging the absence, you are telling the girl it’s ok to disappear for a while, and she’ll do the same to do. Or better yet, not reply back at all…

3. Don’t text a girl and make her do all the work. For example, texting a girl hi, and not really asking questions, and not really asking her out. So, then, buddy, WHY are you texting me? Are you starting a conversation? Are you asking me out? Are you just seeing how I’ll respond? This shows a girl you’re lazy and you don’t know what you want.

4. Don’t blow up her phone. In the early stages of dating, constantly checking in is weird. It’s like you’re trying to see where she is all the time. One or two random texts a day is acceptable. Texting morning, noon and night is too clingy.

Now for the Do’s of Conversing with a Lady through Text Message:

1. Do start with a question, get the ball rolling. How are you? How’s your day? Be interested in the girl. If you don’t know how to talk to a girl, just ask her questions and get her talking.

2. Be courteous, and don’t waste her time. Be there and let her know when you have to leave the conversation.

3. Have a purpose for texting. Ask her out or make conversation. Don’t text her because you’re bored.

4. Text a girl as you would like to be texted. You don’t like when someone is rude to you, don’t do that to the girl. If she disappears, don’t freak out, but also know if she never comes back, you don’t want to be with her anyways. It takes a while to get to know someone in the beginning and there will be a lot of mis-connections. The right lady with be on the same page with you.

Until next time!