One topic I’ve had people ask me about are choosing photos for your online dating profile.
This is another gripe that myself and my girl friends desparately want guys to understand, how to put your best pictures forward and also how to not be misleading.
Let’s face it, when cruising through other people’s online dating profiles, you look at the pictures first, and if you seem satisfied, then you’ll look at the profile to make sure this person isn’t a psycho serial killer, and that you like the same movies (obviously).
Here’s a real-life horror story from one of my online dating adventures. Admist living in LA, I met up with someone I had been chatting with online at a bar/pool hall. The pictures of this guy were of him running a marathon, blond curly hair, very athletic. When we met up in person, guess what he looked like? Fat and bald, the curly hair marathoner was nowhere to be found and I was stuck with this impostor instead.
The marathoner was INDEED the same fat, bald man, but those pictures must have been 5-10 years ago in his prime. I felt so mislead, not ONE picture of him with no hair in any of his pictures. Was I supposed to pretend this was the same person? I went ahead with the date and it went awry after having a “debate” on racisim vs. feminism, so it was pretty much doomed fromt the start.
So, PICTURES, people, are supposed to show your onlookers what you look like RIGHT NOW, and not what you used to look like. Here is a List of Pictures that will lead to your detriment, and probably a bad first date if you do not heed my warnings.
1. The “HOT” Pics of you from Yesteryear – As previously mentioned, be HONEST with what you look like now. You want a girl to like you, but if your pictures are misleading, what else are you hiding?
2. The Sunglasses Pic – This is hands-down my BIGGEST gripe about online dating profiles where a guy will have all his pictures be shot really far away or with sunglasses on, so you can’t really see what he looks like. Hey, if you can see my face clearly, I should be able to see yours clearly. You’re just not playing fair and with this guys, I’m more likely to pass them up, because I STILL don’t know what they look like!
3. Pictures with other girls – This one is pretty dumb. There are guys who pose with other girls in their pictures. Usually if it’s a sister or mom, the guy will state it, but the ones where it’s not explained, you can only assume this was an ex-girlfriend… or some girl the guy was hoping to get with… or just some random hot chick that the guy swindled into taking a picture with. This kind of pictures says: I’m a player. You have to look hotter than this girl I am next to. I’m not serious at all with this dating site. If you’re actually looking for a geniune girl, she will be turned off. How would you feel if you see the girl you are eyeing with tons of hot guys? Not really the first image you want to imagine with the person you could potentially date.
4. The Party Animal Pics – Sure, you’re a fun, out-going guy. You like to party with your “bros” and you know how to have a good time. Although, taking pictures of you wasted, with a wig, dressing like a girl, etc. doesn’t really let a girl like me get true insight into your soul. It just tells me you’re the drunken village idiot, you are not to be taken seriously, and doesn’t make me attracted to you. In my previous post “The Bad Boys Complex” I illustrated how women aren’t attracted to boys, they’re attracted to MEN, and this picture here says, “I’m not reliable, please come pick me off the floor and take me home with you”. If you want a party girl, then by all means, go ahead, but if you want to actually attract someone special, best leave your wild party pics on Facebook where they belong.
So, Single Girl, what pictures should I use? You’re such a buzzkill, man…
Have a couple of pics of your face that are clear! Maybe if you had a beard before and one without a beard. No old pictures, no more than 3 years old. Have a full length picture of your whole body. Pictures with your friends, out traveling is fine and make sure to SMILE! If you have the same sour expression in all your pictures, you come across as an unapproachable guy. Have some that are thoughtful, but at least one with you smiling. Dont have a solo pic of your dog, but you WITH your dog will definitely grab some girl’s attention.
Good luck, soldier!
Have any questions for me? Go ahead and ask me what you’d like me to discuss in further blog posts in the comment section below and I will answer your questions!